In my last blog post, I introduced the concept of  The Sexual Self. Though, at first, we may wonder what sex has to do with business or creative expression, I hope you now see that it is inexorably linked to our confidence and capacity to be authentic.

Feeling like a Goddess, being comfortable in your own skin, and feeling as though you can achieve anything are all manifestations of the Sexual Self. Equally, a deep capacity for creativity and self-expression — which we can all agree helps us thrive in our heart-centred businesses — is available to us if The Sexual self is nurtured and thriving.

As always, please be sure to meditate, breathe and bring yourself into the space of the heart before embarking on self-enquiry.

If you are new to meditation or my practice, I invite you to join our Facebook group, Playing Bigger Playing Beautiful and familiarise yourself with my philosophies and coaching style. Once your join request is approved, you will be greeted with a meditation to get you started. Click here to access it.  

Tuning into the Sexual Self is essential for those wishing to integrate their feminine and masculine energy. If you are unfamiliar with this concept, masculine energy is characterised by doing and achieving. It is grounded in logic and reason. The feminine, on the other hand, is intuitive and open to receiving wisdom and guidance. It is in the feminine that we find the capacity to simply ‘be’. When these two styles of approaching life are balanced, we access a greater sense of harmony, professional success and personal fulfilment.

Are you able to differentiate between what your head (rational brain), heart (emotional brain) or gut (intuitive brain) are telling you? And can you use this information to connect with your sensuality, make wise decisions, learn from the past and avoid unhealthy patterning?

In this blog post, we will examine The Sexual Self with a special focus on The Mind. We will examine our thoughts in response to the dominant notions that arise when we are undergoing various daily tasks such as choosing clothing, eating and exercise. 

Please be reminded to be gentle with yourself. This line of self-enquiry is especially intimate, deeply personal and can unearth areas within that require deeper work. Please approach yourself with gentle kindness, in the way you would a dear friend. 

The goal is to find harmony between our feminine and masculine energies — to be equally able to give as to receive, to ‘do’ and to ‘be’.

For example if you are experiencing complicated feelings about ageing, it may be beneficial to sit with these feelings and unravel the discomfort you’re feeling. Rather than moving into the masculine ‘fix-it’ strategy of purchasing potions and lotions — or an appointment with a plastic surgeon! — take a moment to channel the feminine. Slow down, breathe and open yourself to understanding what is truly at play here. Is this a question of physical appearance or is it more grounded in low self-worth and our society’s self-imposed blindness to women over thirty. 

Ask yourself, is it really another serum you need, or do you require a good healthy reminder that you are more than just your face? Or perhaps if you have a skincare and anti-ageing diet ritual, can you marry that with your spiritual practice so that you can remember yourself both as a being and as an exquisite body? 

Levels of Understanding

If you are familiar with my work, and in particular with my model of emotional self-inquiry The 6 Selves™,  you will know that there are three levels of understanding that inform connections to the self and how it manifests:

Level 1 – Intellect (Mind) – How we comprehend and make sense of the world around us 

Level 2 – Emotion (Body) – How we physically feel the experience

Level 3  – Energetic (Spirit) – How we connect in to something greater than ourselves 

The Sexual Self – Body

In this post, we are looking at the Emotion (Body) and how this connects to the Sexual Self. Please ask yourself the following prompting questions. You will notice they are repetitive in nature. Please know they are designed this way to ignite deeper personal inquiry.

  1. How did my body feel as I looked in the mirror today?
  2. How did my body feel when I chose the food I ate, or will eat, today?
  3. If you exercise regularly ask: How did my body feel when I exercised today?
  4. If you do not exercise regularly ask: How does my body feel when I consider the last time I exercised?
  5. How does my body usually feel when I dress to go out in a personal setting?
  6. How does my body usually feel when I dress to go out in a professional setting?
  7. How does my body usually feel when I am eating with friends or acquaintances?
  8. How does my body usually feel when I am eating with colleagues, team leaders or mentors in a professional setting?

Making space for gentle self-enquiry has the capacity to open possibilities in our personal and professional lives. I hope this exercise has been revelatory.  

My next post will delve further into the Sexual Self with regards to how it connects to the Energetic (Spirit) at a level two understanding. 

Big Love, 

Deb x 

For more information on how to work with me to go deeper into the benefits of The 6 Selves™ and the outcomes you can achieve when you focus intentionally on these areas visit